It was a windy night: a night of deep chill and frost upon the sullen streets of University Park.  Rachael Simon and I were on a  mission: to explore the uncharted waters on campus: places where angels fear to tread.  We're no angels, Rachael and me.  We're filmmakers.  Well, actually, we're just taking this class....hmm. Anyway. We decided to film our mystical journey into the great beyond of the Pennsylvania State University. 
 
 
 
 

We commenced our journey by burrowing deep into the bowels of Tyler Building.  It's a rather old building, and we thought that thebasement might be spooky.  It wasn't.  In fact, there wasn't a single interesting thing down there.  We found a room that had a nifty sink in it, and Rachael found a glass cupboard and seemed fascinated by her reflection in it; but other than doors opening and closing by themselves and a shoddy spackeling job in a random room, we found....nothing really all that interesting. Click the picture of Rachael to see what I mean.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

drain

lock

bucket of spackel

We then decided to explore the roof of the Eisenhower Auditorium carpark.   The shadows danced about under the cloudy sky.  The wind whipped through the trees like a rabid donkey.  The view of State College and Tussey Mountain proved splendid, but the wind-chill factor proved not-so-splendid.  In fact, it stunk. So we decided to go to ground level once again. 
 

We filmed an abandoned back-hoe and the construction site for the new science buildings. Nothing exciting. Perhaps there would be more action in the HUB.  The HUB was, sadly, dead. We tried to break into the movie theatre, but someone had locked it - presumably, I'll warrant, to prevent us from filming anything in there.  Bastards.  the MAC machine proved too boring to film.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

After filming some trash in Osmond Building and talking to a nice janitor who thought we were weird, we slyly made our way into the lift, which had, to my surprise, double doors.  Tricky....those cunning science people.  Top floor.  There it was, the exit to the roof. We looked out the door at the giant telescopes looming into the nighttime sky, like giant Saturnian rubbish bins. 

"Can we help you?"  said an accented voice in the dark.  We peered in the door from whence the mysterious voice came. Two  bored-looking silhouettes sat in the gloom and doom of 6th-floor Davey. One had wild blue hair. 

"We would like to go on the roof." 

"Sorry, it's locked.  We have open house on Friday," said one of the mysterious silhouettes - the one without blue hair. 
Zounds!  Foiled again! 
 

We decided to go and visit Bernard Kelly in his office.  Perhaps HE was doing something interesting.  He's a scientist. Scientists are interesting, ergo, Bernard should be interesting too.  Perhaps he was trying to figure out how to defy gravity and hover about like Casper the Ghost.  That would be interesting.  And a bit freaky. But Bernard wasn't doing a damn thing, just playing on the computer and reading something having nothing at all to do with gravitational physics: Harry Potter.  (Wait, I take that back.  People defy gravity in those books all the time; well, at least during Quidditch.) 
 

But! Scientists are supposed to talk exciting jargon! They're supposed to wear lab coats and/or say "billions and billions!"   What was BERNARD doing, goofing around on a swivel-chair in a long-sleeved t-shirt? Was he possibly a poseur?

Then... I espied a complicated formula on the board.  Aha!  Behold, the amazing blackboard....of science! Now came the time for Bernard to prove himself to the planet as a gravitational physics EXPERT! So he tried explaining it, but beyond the words "beta" and "alpha" it was incomprehensible. Click on Bernard for a lesson in gravitational physics.  Perhaps you might make sense of it.

But that was proof enough that he actually knows what he's talking about. We pestered poor Bernard further by trying to figure out the answer as to why Old Main feels it absolutely necessary to have a zillion security cameras... only to conclude that we had no bloody idea why and that it was a waste of money, and that nothing interesting actually happens near Old Main, anyway.  Rachael suggested that perhaps Old Main is the centre of a top-secret government organisation, that we should film people at Zeno's, and then go into Zeno's ourselves and have a few drinks.  Actually, she said that at the parking deck, but I just now remembered that bit and at present, it sounds like a jolly idea.  Cheers.
 
 
 
 
 
 

Then!  Like a shot in the dark! 
"Hey man," said a familiar, slightly Slavic voice.  Rachael and I whipped around in astonishment. It was Blue-Haired Accent Man! We pleaded with him gently to let us up on the roof.  Bernard said we weren't naughty and would behave ourselves.  Muahahaha.  Fool.  For little did he know that we were on a mission....a mission of...what was that we were doing again?  Filming toilets and shoes! 
 
 
 
 
 

The journey to the roof was long and tiresome and vertical.  Actually, it was just two floors up from Bernard's office.  But we were definitely closer to outer space.  As we waited for Blue-Haired Accent Man to get the keys from the secret cupboard, we glanced at the mural on the wall.  I had a strange sense of déjà vu.  Click the picture of the Mysterious Man for a glimpse of the wonder which we saw upon the roof!
 

"GUESS WHERE I AM FROM!" he demanded.
"Ummm....Poland?" I ventured.
"HAHAHAHA.  No.  Not Poland.  Close.  I am from Yugoslavia."

Actually, considering the blue hair, I think he was a friendly visitor from Jupiter.  The roof itself looked, as my friend Jon later described it so bluntly, like a lunar landing.  In fact, if you ask me, Davey Lab is in fact a wormhole in the space-time continuum which ends up directly on the surface of Mars. But you didn't ask me, and all I have to say in that case, is, "you can't see a damn thing when it's overcast."  Or undercast, either. The walls are about 10 feet high.
 

Yes, indeedy.  Rachael and I sure got an eye- and ear-ful in Davey that night.  I'm not sure exactly what of, but exploring the rooftops of buildings sure beats sitting around drinking beer and watching Fred Astaire.  Actually, I'm lying.  I'm going to go do that now.  Rachael is asleep on the floor of the lab.  I'm not kidding. 

Goodnight, Gracie.